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I firmly hold the belief that it is always possible to transform. I think you truly can train a seasoned creature, provided that the experienced individual is open-minded and eager for knowledge. So long as the old dog is willing to admit when it was wrong, and work to become a better dog.

OK yes, I am that seasoned creature. And the trick I am attempting to master, even though I am a creature of habit? It is an major undertaking, a feat I have battled against, repeatedly, for my entire life. The quest I'm on … to grow less fearful of the common huntsman. Apologies to all the remaining arachnid species that exist; I have to be realistic about my possible growth as a human. It also has to be the huntsman because it is imposing, in charge, and the one I encounter most often. This includes a trio of instances in the previous seven days. In my own living space. I'm not visible to you, but I’m shaking my head at the very thought as I type.

It's unlikely I’ll ever reach “fan” status, but I've dedicated effort to at least becoming a baseline of normalcy about them.

I have been terrified of spiders from my earliest years (unlike other children who adore them). During my childhood, I had ample brothers around to ensure I never had to engage with any myself, but I still freaked out if one was obviously in the general area as me. Vividly, I recall of one morning when I was eight, my family still asleep, and trying to deal with a spider that had crawled on to the family room partition. I “managed” with it by standing incredibly far away, almost into the next room (in case it chased me), and emptying half a bottle of bug repellent toward it. The spray failed to hit the spider, but it did reach and irritate everyone in my house.

With the passage of time, my romantic partner at the time or cohabiting with was, as a matter of course, the bravest of spiders in our pairing, and therefore responsible for managing the intruder, while I produced frightened noises and beat a hasty retreat. In moments of solitude, my method was simply to vacate the area, plunge the room into darkness and try to forget about its existence before I had to enter again.

Recently, I stayed at a companion's home where there was a very large huntsman who made its home in the window frame, primarily hanging out. In order to be more comfortable with its presence, I envisioned the spider as a female entity, a one of the girls, one of us, just lounging in the sun and eavesdropping on us chat. This may seem rather silly, but it worked (a little bit). Alternatively, actively deciding to become more fearless worked.

Be that as it may, I've endeavored to maintain this practice. I contemplate all the sensible justifications not to be scared. I know huntsman spiders won’t harm me. I recognize they prey upon things like insect pests (creatures I despise). I know they are one of the planet's marvelous, benign creatures.

Unfortunately, however, they do continue to move like that. They move in the utterly horrifying and somehow offensive way possible. The sight of their numerous appendages carrying them at that frightening pace causes my caveman brain to kick into overdrive. They claim to only have a standard octet of limbs, but I am convinced that increases exponentially when they move.

But it is no fault of their own that they have scary legs, and they have an equal entitlement to be where I am – possibly a greater claim. I have discovered that taking the steps of working to prevent instantly leap out of my body and run away when I see one, trying to remain still and breathing, and consciously focusing about their beneficial attributes, has begun to yield results.

Just because they are fuzzy entities that dart around with startling speed in a way that causes me nocturnal distress, is no reason for they warrant my loathing, or my shrieks of terror. It is possible to acknowledge when my reactions have been misguided and motivated by baseless terror. I doubt I’ll ever attain the “catching one in a Tupperware container and taking it outside” level, but you never know. There’s a few years within this seasoned learner yet.